14 Ways I've Become More Feminine
Updated: Apr 13, 2019
Happy Friday my dear reader!
Thank you for tuning in! I usually post a Thursday blog, but I pushed back to today just to take yesterday off and spend time with my husband. But today we are back on the grind and I am SO excited to do this topic!
My Instagram bio says that I am a "Feminine Homemaker," so today I want to put my money where my mouth is and explain 14 ways that I have grown to include more femininity in my everyday life!
I think there is a time and a place to be a "bad-ass" but it’s also okay to apply a little bit of that old-fashioned femininity into our lives. Today for context, I am going to be talking about the type of femininity that expresses itself in the virtues of kindness, benevolence, gratitude, and beauty.
Remember: KINDNESS, BENEVOLENCE, GRATITUDE, AND BEAUTY.
1. I have begun taking an extra 10 minutes to beautify my hair & face
Just 10 minutes! Not too long to take away from other things, but enough time to really get a handle on my appearance. Throughout the day, I remember that I am communicating through my face, so I try to take pride in it! Frame your beautiful face with a nice hairstyle or head wrap; frame your eyes with some moisturizer or mascara; whatever your beauty schtick is--makeup or no makeup--just take some extra time to get things in order.
2. Put on a full "outfit" in the morning
A full "outfit" means putting on a look that goes together. I am a huge proponent of women expressing their style and dressing for comfort. So wear yoga pants if you want, but try to wear them with a cute sweater or tunic top. Sloppily putting together random pieces puts a damper on your day. Try to explore your creativity and beauty clothes! And if you hate finding outfits to wear, do my trick: figure out 10 different outfits that you LOVE to wear, and wear them on REPEAT!
3. I began exploring cooking
Feminine virtues of kindness and generosity can be epitomized in the act of cooking and serving others. Cooking and preparing food is a very ancient feminine practice that allows you to explore creating, giving, and serving others. And if you hate cooking, try to plate your take-out on cute plates, or learn some simple recipes for a sit-down dinner! You don't need to be Rachel Rae, just try to explore some new recipes.
4. Actively encourage others WITHOUT limit
I try to encourage my husband every day, telling him what I love about him and encouraging him in his job. I also like to use social media to send short sweet messages and encouragement to other ladies. And in real life, if I see someone with a lovely outfit on at the store, I will try to let them know I think they look great. Encouraging others costs you NOTHING but a little bit of courage to speak out.
5. I take time to become educated on current events
No I'm not talking about the current events of Kylie Jenner (although I do love me some Stormi news every once in awhile.) I'm talking about world current events! Feminine energy means being intelligent: not vapid or uninformed. I take time throughout the day to read the news, learn about our international climate, and get in touch with new developments in science, economics, and the tech industry. It helps me understand other people and to stay connected with the greater narrative of our world.
6. Spend time with friends or make plans to
Femininity is about giving and receiving love: by actively seeking out community, you can love and support others and be supported yourself! Every day I try to reach out to others to stay connected. I also try to make intentional plans and fill my calendar with dates to spend time with other women.
7. I've begun exploring old-fashioned "feminine" arts
So I'm not exactly crocheting, embroidering, or knitting every day, but I have begun to explore sewing! I have also always enjoyed sketching, playing piano, and reading. These small hobbies and tasks are wonderful ways to explore creativity! I have many Instagram friends who knit, make jewelry, macrame, weave wool, practice calligraphy, and more! These feminine arts allow us to create with our hands and beautify the world around us. Many women I know even make money on the side through these arts, but they can simply be ways to beautify your home or to bless others.
8. Beautify your home
The feminine art of homemaking naturally involves decor. I have ALWAYS been one to decorate a space. My mom would leave me to clean my room as a child, only to return to see that I had rearranged my furniture and redecorated my walls. Many women have expressed to me that they're not sure what they're doing when it comes to decorating, but I would say that almost anyone has a knack for what they like or what looks good. Start with some simple art pieces that you enjoy, as well as some curtains and throw pillows. Small changes can make a huge impact to the warmth of a space!
9. Stay in control of your environment
I discussed this a little bit earlier this week, but keeping your environment in order is an incredibly feminine undertaking. Feminine energy is one of beautification and kindness. The task of keeping orderly cleanliness is one that will bring beauty and blessing to your entire family. It is not easy to enjoy cleaning, but in my earlier post this week, I discussed how that can be achieved.
10. Nurture your body
I believe that the nurturing spirit associated with femininity can be applied to our own bodies in a variety of ways. I began nurturing my body more this past year through frequent walks, more moisturizer, and healthier food. Nurturing your body could mean a workout, a bath, some body lotion, or a delicious healthy meal. Have tea, receive a hug from your spouse, or pet your dog. Whatever you choose, remember that taking time to show your body kindness will always benefit you in the long run.
11. Explore polite feminine graces
Now I don't think this tip is for everyone, but I have truly appreciated the tips my own mother taught me regarding grace. She always reminded me to sit up straight, to not put my elbows on the table during a meal, and to chew with my mouth closed. These small feminine graces add a huge measure of sophistication and pleasantness to my overall demeanor. And I'm not going to lie, it's kind of fun to act like the Duchess of Sussex in your own home.
12. Listen more
Now I'm not saying that you should not speak AT ALL, but I am encouraging you to consider taking more time to listen and ask questions; basically to "receive" what others are saying. Being receptive is a key element to femininity. You will find as you listen more to others, they will respond to your kind and nurturing spirit. The act of listening should never be overlooked, but even more, I encourage you to think of questions to ask your friends, your spouse, or your family.
13. Learn the art of conversation
Oh the lost art of conversation: how I grieve its demise! Simply learning how to wade through a conversation has become an incredible source of anxiety for many Millenials: why do you think the masses lament "awkward" encounters more than ever before? Because the art of conversation has died!
Before I meet with someone, I take the time to think of some questions and curiosities I have about their life, so that we may have a fruitful conversation. Likewise, I have learned how to properly introduce people to one another, and I always try be aware of who is being left out of the conversation. If you are in groups, avoid "inside" jokes or conversations, and try to make everyone feel included.
14. Volunteer your time
This point goes along with the idea of nurturing others. We can nurture our communities by banding together behind beneficial causes. I think of my friend Elisha, who runs the blog Thrift Ethics. She is always talking about different charitable causes to get involved with, and there is a true kind and nurturing spirit behind her soul. Volunteering to help others displays the generosity and kindness behind the feminine spirit.
I know that the topic of femininity is often overlooked, and can even sound old-fashioned or wacky to modern ears. But I have found great joy, confidence, and satisfaction through pursuing these virtues, and I hope that you do too!
Remember to embrace your femininity this week and unapologetically step into who you are as a woman.